Letter's To God

I watched a show a while ago. it was a real eye opener. you should watch it. i promise its worth your time "letter's to god" is the name.

its a show about a boy who has cancer, and everyday he writes a letter to god and sends it in the mail. the mail man begins to read them and it completely changes his life. 

since this movie i have written many letter's to god, but never sent them. right now though i would like to write a blog a letter to god.

Dear God,

things arent going the way i had planned. then again your plan is whats going to happen, but i guess thats life. you expect it to go one way and it changes. it can change in a blink of an eye. or slowly, so slow you dont even notice its changing. and then it changes and your too late. heavenly father, life hasnt been very easy lately, but then again when is it. life is suppose to be hard. it helps us grow as people. lifes been hard on my brother lately... really too hard.please help my brother heavenly father. just make it easier for him in some way. anyway  and let me know how i can help. heavenly father i dont know how much more he can handle. he walks around like a zombie, irritated at the slightest things. he has become so numb that he doesnt seem to feel anything. i think it makes it harder for him to feel your presences. what kind of world is it that we live in. where when we go to school we are constantly at war, with the devil or friends. maybe even our own self image. we are amazing just the way we are and i think its hard for us to realize that. we need to love, honor, and respect ourselves. there is not one other soul like us out there and we are each different in our own unique way. i havent felt very unique lately. infact i feel like i dont know who i am anymore. i always feel like im trying ot be someone else. and im sick of it i just want to be myself again, but i dont even know what that is. constantly these questions repeat in my head. who are you? why am i here? am i really my own person, do i have great worth? how do you find yourself again when you've completely lost who you were?  i just dont know what to do. i miss alot of people right now heavenly father. like adam. i wish he wouldnt have moved away. its weird not living ten minutes away. i miss him so bad, please let me see him soon. i miss tiffanie.. i wish i didnt have to only find out about her life through facebook and her blog. i miss seeing her everyday like in 9th grade. she was the only friend i had, and i dont think she will ever realize how grateful i am for that and how big of an effect she had on my life. i miss my grandpa all the time. especially when im having a hard time. i just know if he was here i could go talk to him and he'd know what to do. tell him i say hi and that i love and miss him deeply. please help my best friend heavenly father.. she needs to get to school on time. id really like to graduate with my best friend. my family seems to be falling apart, but i take it day by day. i keep my head up and pray each day will be better. heavenly father thanks for all the comfort you give me. i feel it all the time lately, and ive needed it everytime. im glad you know what i need and want cause i sure as heck dont. heavenly father please bless my cousin.. well of of my cousins but this one imparticular. help him to get his life straight. he could really feel your love as well. heavenly father its late and im tired.. its time for bed. but heavenly father... thanks for that you do.

i say these things in the name jesus christ amen.